Taking The Cure

44In 1993 I went to a product seminar about detoxing. Specifically about our need to eliminate waste or poop. It was quite enlightening about the amount of the crap that we tote around. Someone told the old story about John Wayne’s 10 lbs of accumulated waste in his colon at the time of his death. I still shudder to this day imagining that autopsy. Eeeeeewww! Anyway…the speaker went on to talk about the wisdom of children spending adequate time on the potty for a good ‘moving’ experience. Actually I witnessed this at the dentist office a couple of months ago. An 8 year old boy was happily singing to himself in the bathroom which was about 10 feet away from my seat in the waiting area, ignoring calls from his Mom that it was time to see his friend the dentist. The boy kept yelling, “I’m not finished!” His Mom smiled and said, “He likes to take his time.” Good for him! Who wants to hurry to see the dentist anyway. Smart little guy was multi-tasking.

After the seminar I arrived back home with several containers of…I don’t remember…with the belief that when I drank the substance, I would literally poop out and off several pounds of weight. Losing weight is most women’s detox dream, but I now know the real skivvy on the subject. Our bodies continually detox. It’s not a one time event, but part of the body’s highly developed system of balance. A kind of housekeeping that involves all of our parts: body, mind and spirit.

Dr. Deanna Minich’s book, Whole Detox, clearly explains the multi-faceted subject and gives the reader a road map to make changes that will promote better health in cleansing your whole self. Changing how you think about yourself and others, how you talk to yourself and how you approach food will greatly enhance your life instead of creating the stress of sticking to a restrictive diet, or drinking some awful tasting concoction hoping for a one-time detox experience that will forever rid yourself of…whatever. Health isn’t sustained by a single event. Every day your body and mind will perform it’s tasks if fed properly with good food, good thoughts, and specific ways to nourish your spirit.

Many years ago I became convinced that I needed to rid myself of every nasty parasite, known and unknown, to be healthy. I read those ads that told me for a mere $75 (payments were available, or maybe I could get 2 for the price of one!), my detox dreams would come true. But when I finally ordered the kit, I was terrified by the lengthy list of potential harm that the product could cause, and the description of what could be expelled. My utter fear stopped that effort, thank goodness, as well as the absolutely gruesome stories from a couple of people I knew who actually went this route, so I guess it was a $75 learning experience. This episode reminded me that I knew the mystery of what lurks in our gut already. And I learned from the master.

As a child, I listened intently as my Grandma Rose told dark healing stories that truly frightened me about the critters she extracted from her children and close relatives, and I believed every one. I would beg her to tell me these stories over and over, knowing that I wouldn’t sleep after hearing them. One involved a push mower and the result of straining too hard. You get the picture. But make no mistake, Grandma loved the telling as if the knowledge was ancient, only available to a few, and always embellished with such memorable pictures that they became imprinted in my mind in a way that I would almost swear I witnessed each one in all it’s glorious gore.

Alice Rose was steeped in East Tennessee hill lore, and was a survival story herself having birthed and raised 9 babies with no running water or electricity in her house. Oscar, my granddad, was sort of on the periphery of my childhood. Grandma was the central figure to her family, and when she painted those vivid scenes of extricating varmints from folks, I listened and believed!

33My absolute trust in Grandma’s mojo was cemented at 5 years old on one steamy, East Tennessee summer evening . It was a Sunday event that only happened to the chosen few, and I was a witness to this miracle during a “come to Jesus” call in the wide, deep part of the creek that meandered in front of her house. There were a few folks walking into, not on the water, which didn’t jibe with my Presbyterian understanding of miracles. Vacation Bible School was very specific concerning miracles. So not understanding the whole baptism theology of submersion (we Presbys were not even sprinkled until 12 or 13), they looked very serious and a tad crazy rather than having received any kind of blessing, but Grandma said it was a miracle, therefore it was. No one looked “delivered.” They were all just standing around watching the converts slowly being dipped in the creek, then shouting “Hal-lay-lew-yuh!” when the soaked folks emerged. I guess I thought the miracle was that they weren’t drowned, but lived to tell the tale. This scene was replayed in the movie, “O Brother, Where Art Thou” as the congregation slowly moved to the river to save the sinners, singing:

As I went down in the river to pray
Studying about that good ol’ way
And who shall wear the starry crown?
Good Lord show me the way!

O sisters let’s go down
Let’s go down, come on down
O sisters let’s go down
Down in the river to pray

After the indoctrination of the wet conversions, I was totally convinced that Grandma Rose knew some big secrets when she told me if I had a persistent tickle in my throat, it might be a w##m (nasty squiggly thing!), and that I should immediately eat some salt to stop it’s possible exit. Boys Hattie! (I know that phrase doesn’t make any sense, but it’s necessary. lol) I ate salt! Even in the middle of the night! I’m pretty sure I consumed enough sodium chloride for my entire family’s lifetimes, but there certainly were never any traveling squigglies either!

In order to detox without eating copious amounts of salt, I suggest reading Whole Detox by Dr. Deanna Minich, to understand how all parts of your body work together to continually detox and balance. Anthony William who has identified many foods, supplements and much more to rid yourself of all sorts of health devouring viruses and other harmful substances in his book, Medical Medium, also included a cleanse for boosting your body’s immune system to move your healing forward.

Although there are people who have serious parasites, especially in third world countries, we may have co-evolved with a few creatures into a mutually beneficial relationship. Not every one of the little buggers is an enemy. We humans just don’t want to believe that there may be uninvited friends that are smarter than us, and  have purer intentions.




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